Today I ate...

The goal of the DS is to eat a significant amount of protein... this is typically where I start when I am reframing my eating plan.

In no way do I intend to use this blog to track my eating but if you're interested in what a typical DS diet consists of

Breakfast

3/4 BBQ Chicken Breast (who said breakfast must  = eggs)
Spcial K shake (there are better options but these were on hand)

Snack:

Oikos greek yoghurt...love the keylime flavour

Lunch:

Salad made with

Avacado
Sundried tomotoes
Red peppers
Chicken breast
Home made bacon bits
Spinach
Enoki mushrooms
Mango Chipolte dressing

All I can say is yum, yum and more yum.

Dinner

2 homemade tacos with cheese and refried beans...

I no longer prescribe to the concept that some foods are for certain times of the day only. As long as my body gets what it needs and I am enjoying it... I'm good.

The Gift of the Duodenal Switch

Weight loss surgery, like many other transformational decisions in life, is not a decision to be made lightly. Surgery, any surgery, changes your life forever. In my case it changed the basic way that I digest and absorb food. The sheer mechanics of my DS means that I do not absorb fat or protein easily (nor the associated vitamins) and it also means that carbs are more easily absorbed - yes, sugar is still an enemy.

When I reflect back on the last 6 years - I have learned a few things

1. If I want my DS to fail all I need to do is eat simple carbs - and lots of them. If you can survive the gassy impact that will cause your weight will go up.
2. If you do not eat enough of the right foods your blood count will be impacted. This is a slow process - there is often no immediate sign that your body is missing something it needs for health. Quite often the first sign is when you have a serious problem on your hands. My vitamin D (fat soluble) is in the toilet.
3. The DS is a weight loss solution - not a self esteem or head issue solution. This is huge...most of us aren't fat because of the food, we're fat because of the way we use food... its a self chosen action thing and yet many of us do not either know why we are doing or, and I think I fell into this field, know how to not do it. Food became the answer  - to questions that didn't require food.
4. The DS is an amazing tool. The moment, and I mean moment, you start to do the things that you know will help you be healthy (given the parameters of the DS) you will lose weight. In the last four days I have eaten more than I normally would, I feel better than I have in a long time AND I lost 5.5lbs. The weight loss will not continue at this rate but it's heartening to see.

Key to all of this though is the head issues. Stress management, comfort...whatever the need of choice... will ultimately not be found in a food item. What is different for me this time around is I am different. Older for sure. Wiser, I hope but more importantly at peace with myself and my choices. I have given myself permission to put myself first. Many will not understand this, it's common sense right? Well for me it wasn't. My worth was too closely tied to the desire to care for others... I didn't equate self care as part of that process. Isn't it selfish after all to take time away from the family to go to the gym, to cook what you liked, to take some quiet time to re-energise? It's taken me 48 years to get to this point...re-engaging with the gift of my DS is part of that process.

A few days ago I stood on the scale for the first time in a really long time. My weight had gone up from the last time I checked but refreshingly I did not feel the need to go down the path of self blame. It is what it is - my choices suited me at the time. I am in a place to make better choices.

I am excited for the journey. I have a new vision... fabulous at 50. This refers to every area of my life... my health is simply my starting point.

Out of the silence...

It's hard to believe that it's been over 4 years since I've blogged last. The answer to "why?" is easy and complex at the same time. The easy answer is "life took over" and a valid answer at that...isn't that what we all want? As an overweight person my greatest wish was to de-emphasise the weight issue, to be normal...where food is for sustenance and weight is not the primary reason for choosing or eating it.

The more complex answer is that old habits die hard... with a side of self awareness thrown in that has helped me to understand that self worth, success, weight and life are intricately linked. My choices in life have been very much about not valuing myself the same way in which I value others.

So why come back now? As part of my ongoing educational journey I recently completed my Graduate Certificate in Executive Coaching. I entered the course for very functional reasons and instead found my passion, and in doing so started to understand myself.

The bottom line for me is - if I am to be an effective Executive Coach  I need to be able to walk the same journey I am asking my clients to walk for themselves. In making that commitment I have come full circle and back to this blog.

I am also struggling with my health. None of it DS related (spinal stenosis and degenerative disc disease) but the last 6 months have been a real wake up call for me. Through my pain haze I've come to realize that unless I take ownership of me, my health and my own well being then I am on a path that will take me to a very sad and very painful future. I do not want that for myself and for those I love.

Reinvigorating my commitment to my DS and to being a healthier weight is part of my "solution"... and only part. This journey is not just about weight, it's about well being. That encompasses my body, by mind and my relationships. It's probably the most complex project I have taken on but it is all part of my "fantastic and fifty" plan. I have 18 months before I reach the milestone of being half a century old... that 18 months is a gift I am determined not to squander.

As I would ask my coaching clients... "what does great look like for you"... "what do you see in 18 months?"...

In 18 months I will be eating to fuel my body  and not  my emotions. I will be in healthy productive relationships with those that mean most to me. I will weigh less - at least 60lbs less - and I will laugh often. I will be coaching more than I am leading. I will do things that make me happy. I will dance in the rain. I will stop to smell the roses and I will love where I live. I will live true to my passions.

That is my vision for me.

This blog will become a record of that journey - it will be about weight, it will be about mind, it will be about growth...and most of all it will be about living a fantastic life.

Step 1: Assess the current state - only then will I be able to work out exactly what I need to do.
- get blood work done
- weigh myself
- redo my foundational document (assessment process created by Coaching Out of The Box...well worth the effort)
Step 2: Develop a plan
Step 3: Live it
Step 4: Celebrate it.

Simple right?

I am excited, scared and ready, all rolled into one. It's time.