Transformational

More on where I've been the last month (OMG it's been a month!) shortly but I've had something on my mind that I need to write down. I need to be able to look at it and "see it". I'm a visual learner in the most stereotypical kind of ways.

Life is short.

It has to be one of the most common, most used and yet most overlooked statements known to mankind. Life is short. The words just don't do it justice. Even saying it slowly, placing emphasis on each word as if they were a statement in their own right, does nothing to truly express the enormity of what these words are saying.

We, as human beings, have a limited time on this earth. None of us knows exactly how long we have and yet each day we make decisions about how we use each minute, each hour, that we have available to us. A few of these decisions are mindful ones where we truly think through the consequences of the decision we are contemplating but for the most part we make decisions by rote, not even aware that a decision is being made.

We spend more time on dealing with the immediate moment than time on the things that bring us joy, pleasure or fulfilment. We are so busy doing what we think we have to do that we lose sight of the fact that life is short.

I don't want my life to be a series of little decisions that are designed to get me through the day. I don't want my life to be filled with reactive battles that drain the soul and with it my capacity to find joy. I don't just want to be.

I want my life and the things that I do to be transformational. I don't mean that I want to necessarily do something huge that changes the world in one blinding swoop but I do need to know that the little things I do on a daily basis are meaningful. That they have the power to transform... one little bit at a time. I want to make a difference. In my life. In the life of the people that I love. As a corporate citizen. As a human being.

No, I'm not having a mid life crisis (I think) but I do feel like I'm having an awakening of sorts. I'm starting to really think about what I do in a day. I am starting to question whether my efforts are having the maximum potential impact. Life is short. I only have so many days on this earth to make a difference. Is reading 150 emails a day how I am going to best serve the needs of my company or is creating the ideal learning environment going to allow me to do that? Is battling the ever selfish, ever stupid 14 year old going to help him be a better person or is it time that I let lifes consequences help him discover those lessons for himself? I am not saying that one is right over the other but in order to have the opportunity to do transformational things I believe that decisions need to become more mindful.

We live in a reactive world. We react to time pressures, deadline pressures, peer pressure, kid pressure, spouse pressure. We react to pressure. Very few people make sound decisions under constant pressure. We become reactive where we would benefit most if we could be mindful. Mindful is the basic stepping stone to transformational.

My goal for myself is to become more mindful. To be aware of the decisions that I make. To focus on those things where I can be most impactful. Positively impactful. Whether I make the leap to transformational I will leave for those that write my eulogy to decide but I want to be fully in the moment as I seek to make the journey to that point.