Silence on the Net
It's very rare that I go for this long without penning something... I guess life has just taken precedence this week.
This week has been a strange combination of apathy and trying to get ready for a new job. Without the official offer for a job that I start on Monday I feel a little vulnerable. It's an odd situation but one that will hopefully pay big time. We should know tomorrow. I hope to be celebrating tomorrow night.
I think I'm nearly ready for work. I have a new bank account set up, I have shoes (this was my biggest concern), I have clothes to get me through the first little while, I have been working diligently on Ms 8 to manage her expectations regarding the level of expected travel and I have been working on the boys regarding their need to step up. The latter is not progressing so well.
Mr 16 is causing more than his fair share of grey hairs. No he's not into anything overly stupid, well, not that we've caught him at yet. He's a liar. A constant habitual liar. Yesterday he got caught out at something that would have cost him a week of electronics. Enough to make the point about willfully disobeying a request. When caught out he blatantly lied. I gave him no fewer than 3 occasions to come clean on his own right. Nada. On top of all that he tried to enlist Mr 14 to cover for him. What Mr 16 doesn't realize is that we had siblings too. I expected this and was ready for them. No only has he now lost his beloved electronics until the end of this semester, he has totally blown away the few shreds of trust that I had left in him. He doesn't get. It's only a few lies came flowing from his mouth. No my son, it's not only a few lies. It's a message that you have no respect for yourself, your parents or your siblings. It's a message that we should not believe anything that you say because lying has become so ingrained for you that you cannot tell the difference any more. It's a message to say that you are not mature enough yet for the responsibilities, and privileges, that comes with being 16. A few little lies say so much.
Just in case you were wondering. I have a real problem with lying.
On a more on topic rant, my weight continues to fluctuate up and down around the 220lbs mark. Today 222. My rant is not that this DS is not working. I wouldn't dare. My rant is about myself. I am having a horrible couple of weeks. I am making bad choices. I am not getting in enough fluids and I'm pretty sure I'm not getting in enough protein. My first choice of foods this week is salty and spicy. It's the quick fix crunch factor. Quick fix is rarely low carb or high protein. Arrgghhh.
I'm hoping it's stress related. I'm hoping it's menstrual related. I'm hoping this too shall pass. But I tell ya, this is hard. This is the closest I've got to feeling the "diet" mentality. That overwhelming, OMG I'm screwing up feeling. The difference is that I'm not saying "well piss on it then" and then proceeding to really and truly ensure that I screw up. No but it's hard to banish the wonderful tasty convenient carbs. And therein lies the answer. Convenience. With me going back to work I need to put some thought into making it convenient to eat right. In my carb induced fog, this is the thing that is coming through the haze.
This week has been a strange combination of apathy and trying to get ready for a new job. Without the official offer for a job that I start on Monday I feel a little vulnerable. It's an odd situation but one that will hopefully pay big time. We should know tomorrow. I hope to be celebrating tomorrow night.
I think I'm nearly ready for work. I have a new bank account set up, I have shoes (this was my biggest concern), I have clothes to get me through the first little while, I have been working diligently on Ms 8 to manage her expectations regarding the level of expected travel and I have been working on the boys regarding their need to step up. The latter is not progressing so well.
Mr 16 is causing more than his fair share of grey hairs. No he's not into anything overly stupid, well, not that we've caught him at yet. He's a liar. A constant habitual liar. Yesterday he got caught out at something that would have cost him a week of electronics. Enough to make the point about willfully disobeying a request. When caught out he blatantly lied. I gave him no fewer than 3 occasions to come clean on his own right. Nada. On top of all that he tried to enlist Mr 14 to cover for him. What Mr 16 doesn't realize is that we had siblings too. I expected this and was ready for them. No only has he now lost his beloved electronics until the end of this semester, he has totally blown away the few shreds of trust that I had left in him. He doesn't get. It's only a few lies came flowing from his mouth. No my son, it's not only a few lies. It's a message that you have no respect for yourself, your parents or your siblings. It's a message that we should not believe anything that you say because lying has become so ingrained for you that you cannot tell the difference any more. It's a message to say that you are not mature enough yet for the responsibilities, and privileges, that comes with being 16. A few little lies say so much.
Just in case you were wondering. I have a real problem with lying.
On a more on topic rant, my weight continues to fluctuate up and down around the 220lbs mark. Today 222. My rant is not that this DS is not working. I wouldn't dare. My rant is about myself. I am having a horrible couple of weeks. I am making bad choices. I am not getting in enough fluids and I'm pretty sure I'm not getting in enough protein. My first choice of foods this week is salty and spicy. It's the quick fix crunch factor. Quick fix is rarely low carb or high protein. Arrgghhh.
I'm hoping it's stress related. I'm hoping it's menstrual related. I'm hoping this too shall pass. But I tell ya, this is hard. This is the closest I've got to feeling the "diet" mentality. That overwhelming, OMG I'm screwing up feeling. The difference is that I'm not saying "well piss on it then" and then proceeding to really and truly ensure that I screw up. No but it's hard to banish the wonderful tasty convenient carbs. And therein lies the answer. Convenience. With me going back to work I need to put some thought into making it convenient to eat right. In my carb induced fog, this is the thing that is coming through the haze.
posted by Aussieabroad at
7:36 AM
1 Comments:
Y'know, going back to work may make it easier to eat right. I find it much harder when I work from home because it's easier to get distracted, I'm not bound by many obligations to do XYZ therefore it's easier to stray. When I've gone into the office, I make sure I pack more than a day's worth of DS friendly foods and then I pretend like the snack machines, et al, don't exist. I also think getting into a routine might help as well. For me, routines work wonders.
Good luck on your first day at the new job!
By
Tia L., At
10:53 AM
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